Trish King’s Parenting Your Dog was the first book we bought in preparation for having a dog. We love to read and “Parenting Your Dog” is a pleasant tale (pun intended) of the parallels between raising kids and raising canines. And it’s packed with sage advice.

Like the wonderful “stupid mom routine”. Trish King describes how you can deal with behavior problems in a wonderfully positive and creative way: you intentionally misinterpret unwanted behavior, reacting in a way that your dog thinks is really stupid, which results in your dog stopping the behavior.

Sounds good, right? Well this one really works and we have the proof: she’s quietly sleeping outside the office door.

Today I was playing with Ducky, then after a little while we moved on to a calmer toy, one that she could play with alone (ha! I thought so anyway). And I went into the office, which is off limits and blocked by a child gate. Ducky decided that was not to her liking and sat on the other side of the gate and barked. Loudly. Demanding. Ouch.

So I decided to try out the stupid mom routine. When she barked a second time, I cheerfully asked, oh Ducky, you want to go out? Then I put on her leash, came with her to the door, and let her out. That is, I let her out for 5 seconds, alone, with the leash still on my side of the door. Then I let her right back in and acted normal again. I brought her the ropey toy and went back into the office. All very cheerfully.

She came and sat at the office door and barked again: “Hey! Two-legged dummy! Play with me!”. Time for take 2 of the stupid mom routine. We went to the door, she went out, I stayed in with the other end of the leash, and 5 seconds later I invited her back in. Ducky didn’t take long to decide how stupid I was. This time she wasn’t interested in another toy, she just gave up on her stupid mom and plopped down on the floor away from the office door.

Thank you Trish King, you’re a genius.